If I were you, I would be skeptical
Two months from now, I will be heading to the old Kilbey place, the home of the Orphan Wisdom School for the fifth time in the last eighteen months.
Compared to many of you reading this, I'm probably relatively new to StephenJenkinson (I usually say it in one breath, no space between),.
In August 2021, in a cesspool of being canceled, having my "communities" of breathwork and yoga and birth ravaged by gender politics and germ + terrain theory debates and a loss of a common view of reality as well as having many personal relationships threadbare or gone, Matthew Stillman...
BE/LONGING
I've toured a lot in the last decade, though things pandemical put a crimp - a proper, necessary crimp - in automatic travel for a while.
When I started all this, paper maps - the ones with the worn folds obliterating some of the critical information, with road food stains making it hard to read - were vital to the proceedings. They were paper hints, really, that we traced with our fingers, guessing how long it would take to drive an inch.
Since that time, as everybody seems to know, it's mapquest and google map and the like. I watch the drivers...
Birth and Death Among Us
This life of ours isn't ours. The brevity and happenstance alone shows us that.
It isn't a circle, not really. It's not a line from here to there. They're fine enough shapes, but they've no depth, not much room for mystery and consequence. This is surely a time for mystery and consequences. For them you need a spiral.
A spiral gets you memory without repetition. It wrings wisdom from experience. It's from the spiral that you draw down the rough magic of being born, the alchemy of Godparenthood, the greying heart of age, the grief love of dying, the awe of all of...
Can’t Fix Wonder
I'm invited to a lot of interviews. I think I cooperate with the interviewers. It's an honour to be asked. I try to be a good guest. I find that even the confrontations seem to go fairly well. I'm a fan of mystery, which keeps me saying yes.
The last one was uncommon, though. It led me again to wonder about the wisdom of wondering aloud. I don't have a programme of sorts for 'change'. I'm no more an agent of change than you are. I have answers to go along with the questions. I have responses. But I don't...
Knotwork
Event Details
Birth & Death Among Us with Stephen Jenkinson and Kimberly Ann Johnson
Part 1/3 of an 3 part on-line conversation on successive Sundays starting January 15th
R e g i s t r a t i o n link ($225 Regular Price).
You've misheard your spouse.
In most people's' worlds - even the morally and ethically single, even the polymorphous - those four words spell out foreboding, and things going sideways. 'Giving' heading off in the direction of 'misgiving'. Or worse.
A while ago my wife's birthday was coming on with haste. She's a person prone to giving herself. I don't know why...
A Rabbi For a Minute
Maybe a year before the pandemic set in, maybe two, I was on a bit of a European speaking tour. Somehow an invitation came to appear in Israel, from a standing start, with no prior contacts that I knew about. What might I have to bring to a place and a people that have seen so much?, I wondered. We landed in the middle of the night, as I recall, to a true spectacle of overlapping and recurring security measures. Within a few days I was taken through old Jerusalem and to the Second Temple wall which, for a...
The Stranger Silence Between
Why do we say silence ‘falls’,
like it’s some kind of cloud lurking in the rafters just waiting to descend uninvited,
when it is The Host that welcomes us in to an empty space in the first place,
there before we arrive and there after we leave?
A man walks alone, from pool of light to pool of light along the walkway that hugs the theatre on Vashon Island, WA. He is tall and thin, older and masked up, and he spots me lingering in the shadows of the recycling bins trying to quell post-gig anxiety that can pop up now and then....
One Post, One Beam
The origin story of the Nights of Grief and Mystery is an unlikely dovetail joint of timing (the Deity's middle name), money (not ours) and self-unemployment (Hoskins and me). Within eighteen months of our meeting we were touring widely, and people were coming to the shows on several continents, we had a record, and we were learning how to keep up our end of an undeclared ceremony in ceremonially-illiterate times. The scale and scope prompted us - wonder of wonders - to consider adding a band to our band width.
When lightning agrees to coalesce in the fruitjar you raise...
Reckoning the Kids
I've been asked from time to time whether I mind that not many people of colour - not my phrase for it - come to things I do. My answer, then and now, is: not at all. I would want for their sakes that there are some of their own people who are doing good work - of course, there are - and I would want them to go there. This being the ideologically segregated time that it is, the question isn't surprising.
I'm rarely asked about kids coming to what I do. I was asked the other day, though,...
You Begin in The Light
You take a few steps up to the stage, and go to the microphone. The people behind you take their places. The lights in the house go dim. The people before you disappear. You make as if the entirety of the world is here, now. You give yourself some kind of redemptive task to fulfill. You commence the conjuring. The music murmurs. You speak.
Two hours later, you thank the people for the gift of their evening. Mostly they're on their feet, uncertain of what might have just happened. An hour later, you're in a hotel room somewhere, more uncertain...
I Close My Eyes
I close my eyes when I sing. I always have.
As far as I can tell, it’s not to exclude the watching crowd, or the band with me on stage. It’s to include the words.
I get distracted easily, interpreting people’s postures and facial expressions, and a full-on conversation starts in my head while I’m trying to wring whatever I can from the words and the silences between them.
At a show in Denver, I’m packing my gear and an elderly woman approaches the stage in the now empty theatre. In a clear Irish lilt (she’s from the Old Country), she lets me know how thankful she...
Psychic Physics
If you mean to undertake something vast, they say, you've every reason to expect that there'll be something vast in the offing. But that doesn't mean you'll gain the prize, or that your dreams will come true. It just means that there'll be a wake of sorts fanning out from your work, a web of consequence that you generate but don't intend. It's just a kind of psychic physics: "equal and opposite reaction", and all that. It's best to calculate for that, too if you're able.
The Nights of Grief and Mystery tour/2022 is now well underway: over the last...
John of the Laundromat
It’s hard to know what an audience at A Night is thinking…or feeling. For one, they aren’t really an audience, they’re unintentional allies in a ceremony. They don’t seem to know it, but we do. Beyond the applause and standing O’s, there is the ever foggy sense of “are they with us?” as we spin the kind of glass that we do. No suspension of disbelief is required for this kind of evening. The deal we are trying to make with them is a different one altogether. If there is good will in the building, we can generally pick up...
Gig Mechanics
The arrow doesn’t know
The target or the bow
It’s born in air
Dangerously unaware.
It flies a faithful arc
Through skies light and dark
No promise it finds its’ mark
But it flies anyway.
From “Arrow” ©2022, Gregory Hoskins
Let’s say you have a good notion of what you’re supposed to be doing with your life — some use the term “a calling”, I don’t — and let’s say that you’re lucky enough to have been supported in a myriad of mysterious ways to do that thing. Fine. Now let’s say that because it has the thumbprint of a certain kind of meant-to-be-ness, you find yourself with one...
The Marvelous, and The Nights
That the one day ends with you playing a rapturous concert in an ages-old theatre in Dublin town, that the following one ends with you bumping into the furniture in the dark at your own house on the other side of the Atlantic, trying to persuade your jetlag that it really is night: something wondrous and something transgressive is at work there. Perhaps it is the conditions of travel now - like eight hours of information-free waiting in the airport, or watching the likely ill-recompensed tarmac personnel capering for selfies in the cave of the engine housing of the...
A Hand in the Dark
Dear Ones,
Last year Stephen Jenkinson and I recorded two podcasts that were the most listened to of anything I have ever recorded.
In their wake, even though I knew he was stepping back, I gathered the courage to invite him to share five Sundays together- a kind of retrospective of his major works.
There are so many one-offs these days. One hour podcasts. One hour interview summits. One hour “master” classes.
What happens if we dare to spend more time together? What happens if we dare to circle back? What happens if we sit next to someone and their body of work...
Starling
In the midst of the sorrow and combustion that has laid claim to the last years/months/weeks, a few of us gathered in a dank former factory on a cloudy afternoon. Over 5 hours, we played and sang, and recited, and a few friends we invited shot the proceedings on iPhones and committed the sounds to tape. Out of that, we sewed together a 45-minute document we called Dead Starling Session, named so after the factory space.
Most working artists have had to make a serious effort at détente with cyberspace, which all at once liberates, then dates, and then pretty...
Watch the preview of the Dead Starling Session
Please feel free to share this with friends and family: A ten-minute excerpt from Dead Starling Session. The two pieces that started it all—Gregory's Take a Little Walk and Stephen's poetic response All the Songs of Love—were last-minute additions to the lineup of the film. What you see here is the first take of the song and the very first (and only) time the band and Stephen run down the poem. It doesn't say everything about Nights of Grief and Mystery, but it says alot.
Working a Sandy Shore
I've a new writing project. It's been nudging me for years - ever since I put my name on a piece of ground in the Ottawa Valley, in eastern Ontario.
I'm thinking I'll write about all of this 'belonging to a place' trouble that so many who look like me have. I'm thinking of involving others in the preparation, via another iteration of our farm apprenticeship.
This place is glacial flood plain, minus all the storied benefit that rivers like the Nile lend to their environs.
It's sand and gravel, and nobody should properly call it a farm. I do, though, in...
PLAY IT
You might be a band when you say it. But you know you're a band when you play it.
You could be a band when you learn your chops. But you know if you're a band once the needle drops.
By year's end, our twenty months of waiting were done. We'd made a record - Rough Gods - but we'd never played it. Not together.
So we chanced it. We threw the knuckle bones, swept the floors, laid the wires, made the calls. December 12'd ourselves.
We tuned and toned, had a few drinks, told some lies, loosened up. Asked the Old Worthies...
All Out of Still
A few months ago a certain degree of unspectacular life adversity leaned over to me and whispered: "What if you stop for a while? You were obliged off the road anyhow by the plague. Why not go the rest of the way there, and choose stillness?"
Clever fellow.
Years ago I remember coming across some stout advice from Robert Bly, bless his bones. He wrote: "It takes a lot of courage to be idle."
Also clever.
I found the momentum of retreating from the fray, it's encouragement and sustenance, to be very short lived. The novelty wore off drastically fast, and then came the...